Shidduch Myth #2: Same Language, Same Age, Perfect Match!

He is an English speaker; she is an English speaker.  They are around the same age.

They are perfect for each other!

OK.  So, many of us in Israel have had to endure this often awkward, sometimes painful experience, due to the good intentions of our Hebrew speaking friends.

It's a bit less awkward when the he and the she immediately see what's going on, and immediately share their suspicions with each other by simultaneous facial expressions.  It's usually at a Shabbat meal, and sometimes a stealth shidduch attempt.  The forced couple leave the Shabbat meal together, with forced smiles on their faces.  Then, when safely around the corner, deep breaths are released, sometimes with a little laughter.  Once in a while, they look at each briefly, as if to suggest that maybe they should go out once.

Nah!

Then they come to their senses, say, "nice meeting you," and part ways, never to see each other, until the next time it happens.

Sometimes, though, it doesn't end as well as the above scenario.  Sometimes, it's a complete disaster.

Disasters ensue when one of the couple, is flattered by the suggestion of a shidduch, or smitten at first sight.

When this happens, the expression "The road to Hell is paved with 'good intentions'" lives up to its full potential.

Yet, those 'good intentions' are exactly why we are not being too hard on our native, Hebrew speaking friends.  This post should be written in Hebrew.  But, for now, we will have to settle with warning those new to Israel, new to the dating scene, or new to both, so that you can prepared for when you receive that innocent, Shabbat meal invitation, from those friendly neighbors you don't know very well.

When you do get to know them well enough, you can take on the responsibility for letting them know, gently, that English speaking Jews around the same age cannot be assumed to be perfect for each other.

That is a myth.

Shidduch Myth #2.