Sunday, August 09, 2009

Shabbath Leftovers - Eiqev 5769: Treppenwitz VS. Esser Agaroth

19 of the Fifth Month 5769

Wouldn't you know it? Shortly after I wrote my first post in this series last week, I receive my [golden engraved] invitation to register for the "Second International Jewish Bloggers Convention." I went immediately to the agenda page, and what do I see?
Session 3C
Be a Better Blogger No one cares what you ate for lunch:
How to write the compelling blog post to build readership.

with David “Treppenwitz” Bogner
3:50 – 4:30 PM (8:50-9:30 AM EST)

This is a clear indicator that one of the following scenarios is in play:

1. Someone within the JBloggers "establishment" (...of which I am clearly not a member) has been reading my blog - Very Doubtful ("They" discount my blog as "extremist."), and has decided to try and sabotage it.

2. There is vast conspiracy to control the content flowing out of the JBlogosphere - Too Obvious, although I am sure that the Israeli Foreign Ministry wouldn't mind being the one in control. But, if there is a conspiracy, then Jameel Rashid is definitely behind it!

3. David “Treppenwitz” Bogner is doing this just to spite me - Doubtful (See scenario #1)

4. David “Treppenwitz” Bogner is lying, and people really do care what I ate for lunch. He's just jealous that his lunches aren't exciting enough to post about, and so he doesn't want anyone to post about theirs. - No Clue He's in India now. So, that means he's either eating at fabulous Five Star Kosher restaurants, or living off of raw fruits and vegetables, cans of tuna he schlepped with him on the plane, and eggs that he prepares himself behind closed doors.

5. Someone in the JBloggers "establishment" assumes that I actually care what other people care about - Very Likely (The JBloggers "establishment" and I do not have the best communication going on. "They" invited the Foreign Ministry representative back to this convention against my explicitly expressed wishes. Go figure...)
And so, without further ado, here's what I had for lunch today. Tell the truth. Do you care?

Today I had rye toast (B) topped with homemade tehinah (B plus - ran out of lemon and olive oil) and sauteed qishu'im (the light green squash that's NOT zucchini) (B), topped off with leftover squash soup (B).

Rye Toast
(70% rye/30% spelt)

slice up remaining rye bread
toast it using your choice of method

(Use "Tehinah Yerushalayim." Everything else is crap. Or ground you own, but that can be a bit time consuming.)

Follow the instructions posted here.

Sauteed Qishu'im
(I forgot to put them in the squash soup I made again this Shabbath.)
Follow the instructions posted here.

Well, I am still waiting for all of those Shabbath meal invitations to begin rolling in....

Hmm... Maybe I will go to the JBloggers Convention, bring some zip lock bags with me, and do some "urban foraging" alla Frum Satire.


Leah Goodman said...

I actually don't give a rat's patoot what you had for lunch. sorry.
but I didn't get invited. so I'm screwed anyway

Esser Agaroth said...

Invited to my house for lunch? Or invited to the convention?

DEMAND your invitation to the convention. ;-}

treppenwitz said...

FWIW, while I'm in India I would love to hear what other people are eating... since I'm eating the shlepped fare you described.

David 'treppenwitz' Bogner

Esser Agaroth said...


1. Thanks for having a good sense of humor. It's all for a good cause, promoting the Bloggers Convention. :-}

2. Next time you're in Mumbai, please help me to connect you with some of the religious Indians from Mumbai, who are now in Israel. They are very hospitable, and might be able to you an invitation or two, or point you in the direction of kosher food there. Just a suggestion....

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