26 of the Fifth Month 5769
Haveil Havalim Blog Carnival Edition #230 is up at Letters OF Thought!
Check out the nice job done by Mottel!
I'm on deck for next week's edition. You may send in your submissions via Blog Carnival's on-line submission form.
Sunday, August 16, 2009
Mercy From Above
26 of the Fifth Month 5769
Think back to what was happening your lives in May. HaQadosh Barukh Hu (The Holy One, Blessed Be He) was showing us mercy.
Will Israel step up to the plate, and make the necessary efforts?
Secret Syrian-Iranian-North Korean missile-test fails, kills 20 Syrians
25 b'Av/August 15, 2009, 1:45 PM
(Debkafile) Japanese intelligence has learned that in late May, Iran, Syria and North Korea secretly test-launched in southern Syria a new short-range ballistic missile developed jointly by Pyongyang, Tehran and Damascus as a substitute for the outdated Scuds still in use in their armed forces, DEBKAfile's military sources report. In May, several new missiles were flown from North Korea and Iran to the Damascus military airfield and thence to Syria's southeastern missile-testing site at Jebel Druze near the small town of Salakhand.
After two weeks' preparation, two of the new projectiles had their first trial-launch - and failed with disastrous results.
DEBKAfile's sources report that they targeted an uninhabited desert area in the North, 500 kilometers away, just south of Ayn Diwar and east of Al Qamishli not far from the Syrian-Turkish-Iraqi border intersection.(It was here that Syria and Iraq, with Russian help, interred Saddam Hussein's weapons of mass destruction in 2001.)
However, one of the missiles strayed 350-400 km west of its projected course, indicating a problem with its guidance system. It exploded in the center of the small town of Manbij north of Aleppo near the Turkish border, killing at least 20 people, injuring 60 and badly damaging the market town.
(Read more...)
Think back to what was happening your lives in May. HaQadosh Barukh Hu (The Holy One, Blessed Be He) was showing us mercy.
Will Israel step up to the plate, and make the necessary efforts?
I'm Shocked To Find That Lynching Is Going On Here!
26 of the Fifth Month 5769
Lorelai of Delicious Jerusalem reminded me of this scene from "Casablanca," and pointed us to the link. It is the perfect description of PM Netanyahu's reaction.
How many times do those of you who voted for the Likud have to be told, "I told you so?"
Netanyahu: 'Shocked' by Arab Lynching of Jew
Hana Levi Julian, 26 b'Av/August 15, 2009, 10:46 PM(IsraelNN.com) Prime Minister Binyamin Netanyahu expressed his shock and concern Saturday night in response to the lynching of a 59-year-old Jewish man at the Tel Baruch beach Friday night by a gang of intoxicated young Arab men from the village of Jaljulya. A 17-year-old girl from Kfar Saba and a 19-year-old female from Petach Tikvah were with the gang.
The prime minister told Public Security Minister Yitzchak Aharonvitch that he was "shocked and worried" by the recent surge in murders around the country. (Read more....)
Lorelai of Delicious Jerusalem reminded me of this scene from "Casablanca," and pointed us to the link. It is the perfect description of PM Netanyahu's reaction.
How many times do those of you who voted for the Likud have to be told, "I told you so?"
Shabbath Leftovers - Re'eh 5769: Esser Agaroth Should Be Listed In Zagats
26 of the Fifth Month 5769
As a Californian, I had no clue what Zagat's Restaurant Guide was until I heard a reference to it on Saturday Night Live. Chris Farley and Adam Sandler played the Gelfands, whose only nighttime excitement seemed to be reading from the popular restaurant guide. I guess they never went out. Chris Farley's character Beverly would read a passage, comment with "Doesn't that sound dee-lish?" or something similar. Then Adam Sandler's character Hank would invariably respond with, "Won't somebody please just shoot me?" or something similar.
Well, since I have started this "Shabbath Leftovers" series, I have begun to hear Beverly Gelfand in my head, raving about my creativity. However, she seems to bet the only one....
Today I am having leftover chicken soup, or as some would insist on calling it, chicken vegetable soup, the vegetables being onions, garlic, carrots, qishuim, and kolrabi. It could have used a stick of celery to tone down the richness, but no matter. I'll rate it a (B plus).
It was seasoned with turmeric, parsley, and my secret ingredient, a couple table spoons of soy sauce. For that "soup is the entire meal" convenience trick, remove the pieces of chicken after boiling for no more than a half an hour, and set aside, so that all of the flavor does not leave it. Add a cup and a half of rice. Don't worry if it overcooks. Add the final herbs and spices. When getting ready to serve, replace the chicken. It will have plenty of time to absorb the various flavors from the soup.
There you have it, chicken, rice, and vegetables all in one!
Now, because I live in such a tiny apartment, one room with a closed mirpeseth (balcony) serving as the makeshift kitchen, I would suffer with a plata on all Shabbath. So, this is what I do. I unplug my electric burner right before sheqi'ath hahamah (sunset), leaving the covered and insulated soup on. There is just enough heat to keep it warm for dinner.
Make sure to see A Mom In Israel's tips for preventing your apartment from getting too hot in the summer, without compromising your Shabbath cooking.
Dessert was my regular morning "fruit shake," with a Shabbath Leftovers twist.
1 banana, chopped
nutritional or vitamin supplement, your choice
leftover grape juice (or wine, or synthetically flavors liqueur, or whatever turns you on)
For good measure, I added a scoop of the disgusting parve ice cream leftover from an event I attended and had to bring something to last night. (I recommend sticking with Strauss, Nestle-mehadrin, or Tofuti.)
Only after adding 2 teaspoons of powdered cacao (not instant hot chocolate mix, for goodness sakes!) was it drinkable. I rate it a C.
Keep those Shabbath meal invitations coming!
As a Californian, I had no clue what Zagat's Restaurant Guide was until I heard a reference to it on Saturday Night Live. Chris Farley and Adam Sandler played the Gelfands, whose only nighttime excitement seemed to be reading from the popular restaurant guide. I guess they never went out. Chris Farley's character Beverly would read a passage, comment with "Doesn't that sound dee-lish?" or something similar. Then Adam Sandler's character Hank would invariably respond with, "Won't somebody please just shoot me?" or something similar.Well, since I have started this "Shabbath Leftovers" series, I have begun to hear Beverly Gelfand in my head, raving about my creativity. However, she seems to bet the only one....
Today I am having leftover chicken soup, or as some would insist on calling it, chicken vegetable soup, the vegetables being onions, garlic, carrots, qishuim, and kolrabi. It could have used a stick of celery to tone down the richness, but no matter. I'll rate it a (B plus).
It was seasoned with turmeric, parsley, and my secret ingredient, a couple table spoons of soy sauce. For that "soup is the entire meal" convenience trick, remove the pieces of chicken after boiling for no more than a half an hour, and set aside, so that all of the flavor does not leave it. Add a cup and a half of rice. Don't worry if it overcooks. Add the final herbs and spices. When getting ready to serve, replace the chicken. It will have plenty of time to absorb the various flavors from the soup.There you have it, chicken, rice, and vegetables all in one!
Now, because I live in such a tiny apartment, one room with a closed mirpeseth (balcony) serving as the makeshift kitchen, I would suffer with a plata on all Shabbath. So, this is what I do. I unplug my electric burner right before sheqi'ath hahamah (sunset), leaving the covered and insulated soup on. There is just enough heat to keep it warm for dinner.
Make sure to see A Mom In Israel's tips for preventing your apartment from getting too hot in the summer, without compromising your Shabbath cooking.
Dessert was my regular morning "fruit shake," with a Shabbath Leftovers twist.
1 banana, chopped
nutritional or vitamin supplement, your choice
leftover grape juice (or wine, or synthetically flavors liqueur, or whatever turns you on)
For good measure, I added a scoop of the disgusting parve ice cream leftover from an event I attended and had to bring something to last night. (I recommend sticking with Strauss, Nestle-mehadrin, or Tofuti.)
Only after adding 2 teaspoons of powdered cacao (not instant hot chocolate mix, for goodness sakes!) was it drinkable. I rate it a C.
Keep those Shabbath meal invitations coming!
Friday, August 14, 2009
National Union: "I Told You So"
Erev Shabbath Qodesh Parshath Re'eh 5769
My commentary is in blue italics....
National Union: Katz vs. Netanyahu, Ben-Ari vs. Ministers
Hillel Fendel, 24 Av 5769/August 14, 2009, 12:53 PM
(IsraelNN.com) In letter to the Prime Minister, MK Katz decries Netanyahu's persecution of Jews in Judea and Samaria (Yesha), while MK Ben-Ari castigates Cabinet ministers for going along with him.
MK Yaakov Katz (Ketzaleh), head of the National Union Party, has written a sharp letter to Prime Minister Binyamin Netanyahu in light of the ongoing decrees against the Jews of Judea and Samaria, entitled, “A Last-Gasp Call to Return to Your Declared Path in the Merit of Which You Were Elected.”
Excerpts from the letter:
A large percentage of residents in Yehudah and Shomron voted for Likud instead of their usual choice, the National Union Party. Many reported voting for the Likud for the purpose of strengthening a Netanyahu government. The National Union could have gained anywhere from one to three additional seats in the K'nesseth, if these "nationalists" had not voted for the man they put into power who has now turned against them.
In a nice and roundabout way, I believe that MK Katz is basically telling all those of you nationists, "I told you so."
Ben-Ari: Barak Acts, Ministers are Silent
Katz’s party colleague, MK Michael Ben-Ari, says that Barak and the other Cabinet ministers share the blame with Netanyahu. Speaking with Arutz-7’s Hebrew newsmagazine on Friday, Ben-Ari said, “The residents of Israel should know that at present, we don’t have a Defense Minister. Ehud Barak is busy with political matters; that’s what interests him.”
My commentary is in blue italics....
National Union: Katz vs. Netanyahu, Ben-Ari vs. Ministers
Hillel Fendel, 24 Av 5769/August 14, 2009, 12:53 PM
(IsraelNN.com) In letter to the Prime Minister, MK Katz decries Netanyahu's persecution of Jews in Judea and Samaria (Yesha), while MK Ben-Ari castigates Cabinet ministers for going along with him.MK Yaakov Katz (Ketzaleh), head of the National Union Party, has written a sharp letter to Prime Minister Binyamin Netanyahu in light of the ongoing decrees against the Jews of Judea and Samaria, entitled, “A Last-Gasp Call to Return to Your Declared Path in the Merit of Which You Were Elected.”
Excerpts from the letter:
“You were elected by loyalists and lovers of the Land of Israel on the basis of your promises that you will protect it and expand its construction. However, ever since you took office, you and your men – chiefly [Defense Minister] Ehud Barak – harass and torment the Jewish of Judea and Samaria simply because they are Jewish. Your decision to freeze only Jewish construction in our capital of Jerusalem, and in Judea, Binyamin, the Jordan Valley and Shomron, is joined by very frequent persecution campaigns and destruction operations against Jewish housing. Every morning we hear of an initiative to destroy yet another Jewish presence in Judea and Samaria.
“Instead of trying to find solutions, you are preventing these pioneers from growing and expanding. I beg you to stop this campaign of destruction and oppression.
“None of the ministers that you appointed to your government are able to explain your strange actions, and the large majority of them stand ashamed and humiliated when they are asked to look their voters in the eye and explain to them. None of them know how it happened that your approach towards the pioneers is much more extremist than your predecessors, Sharon and Olmert. None can explain how it is that you are fulfilling the same policies that you vowed during the election campaign to fight against.
“I wish to warn you that if you continue along this path, it will, without a doubt, lead to your political downfall.
“The public that you are constantly persecuting – they, their parents and relatives – should be the first ones to feel your warm embrace and support. Instead, they receive only empty words and constant persecution and humiliation.
“As in the past, you are unable to identify the true will of the people, and its absolute love for this land, and its disgust with those who destroy it.
“As in the past, you will blame us, the ‘extreme right-wing,’ for the your downfall. (YeSh"A residents were the force behind bringing down Netanyahu, back in 1999, the last time he was in power.) But this doesn’t change the facts; you, with your own two hands, are leading to your government’s fall, by acting in opposition to your own platform.
“We, for our part, will not break, and will continue to build, expand and multiply, even if you continue to torment us. There is a G-d in heaven. You act as if there is no law and no judge – but you should must take to heart what your grandfather knew but you have forgotten: The Nation of Israel is the nation of holiness, the Land of Israel is the land of sanctity, and the Torah of Israel is the Torah of holiness. G-d keeps an account, and He will make an accounting with those who humiliate His people, just as he did with you 13 years ago. In the end, He will remove you from your seat of power, and replace you with the worthy leaders that Israel so deserves.
“I make this call from the depths of my heart and from the depths of the pain of the nation that you are mocking and disgracing: Return from your evil path, and return to the original path you promised to follow and for which you were elected.”
A large percentage of residents in Yehudah and Shomron voted for Likud instead of their usual choice, the National Union Party. Many reported voting for the Likud for the purpose of strengthening a Netanyahu government. The National Union could have gained anywhere from one to three additional seats in the K'nesseth, if these "nationalists" had not voted for the man they put into power who has now turned against them.
In a nice and roundabout way, I believe that MK Katz is basically telling all those of you nationists, "I told you so."
Ben-Ari: Barak Acts, Ministers are Silent
Katz’s party colleague, MK Michael Ben-Ari, says that Barak and the other Cabinet ministers share the blame with Netanyahu. Speaking with Arutz-7’s Hebrew newsmagazine on Friday, Ben-Ari said, “The residents of Israel should know that at present, we don’t have a Defense Minister. Ehud Barak is busy with political matters; that’s what interests him.”
As evidence, Ben-Ari cites Barak’s decision to approve a 50% addition to the number of construction inspectors in the Yesha Civil Administration. “Unfortunately, the unit that he has just enlarged is not charged with dealing with illegal Palestinian construction – only with Jewish building.....”
(SNIP)
Ben-Ari decried the lack of public protest: “It’s an absurd situation, no one is protesting, and we don’t know where it will end. (I have previously suggested to the phenominon of "learned helplessness" found amongst all Israelis these days, whether hit by rockets in the north or south, or by bombs and bullets in the central region.) But I hope that with the passage of the Mofaz Law [making it easier for MKs to split off from an existing party – ed.], some MKs from Kadima and the Likud will quit and will join us instead. I am building on the MKs’ straight thinking and national responsibility; it won’t hurt if seven or so Likud rebels join us in the true nationalist party.”
Is this the solution? We will have to wait and see. In the meantime I will compliment MK Ben-Ari on his courage to speak out, and for his refusal to compromise his principles.
Monday, August 10, 2009
A Tale Of Two Neighborhoods
20 of the Fifth Month 5769
This post flits back and forth between two conversations taking place in separate Jerusalem neighborhoods, and presented in "fashion colors," for CLARITY.
If your blood starts to boil, please push yourself through to the end of the post. You may be surprised by the ending,...or not.
Yes, I know. It's creative, too... It's spiritually creative.
Oh, yes! I see.
AND,...it's creatively spiritual.
Yes!
OMG! I so totally know what you mean. Now we're close to all of the important schuls.
Yeah, but I especially like how it's easy to check out all the hot guys through the mehitzah in the schuls in this neighborhood.
Oh, yeah, cool. I totally forgot about that!
Really?
Yes. And you also have to make your payos like mine, or else you're not spiritual.
But, no one in Me'ah She'arim makes them like that, and there are some pretty strong hassidishe traditions there.
Doesn't matter. I could teach THEM a thing or two about spirituality. You know what else? I knew Reb Shlomo better that anyway here at this party. They couldn't possibly understand his Toirah and his Simcha like *I* do. Hey! You over there, would you pass the joint over here?!
Yeah, I know. Did you know that we have lesbians for neighbors now?
No. Really?
Yes. You can't get more enlightened and progressive than that!
No, you sure can't.... But, we'd never actually have to invite them into our house, would we?
Oh, no! Of course not!
Wow, that's SO spiritual!
Yes, I know. Hey, you over there! Would you stop hogging the joint!!
Why? What happened?
My Abba cut my allowance down from $1,500 down to $1,250.
OMG! That's so totally unfair!
Yeah, I know! He says it's because the cost of living is much cheaper in Israel than in "The City."
By the way, since when did you start calling your daddy "Abba?"
Oh, no. You don't understand. I've ALWAYS called my daddy "Abba."
(Under her breath: "Yeah, right.")
Well,...yes. But, it's not what you think! ...not entirely, anyway.
You see, I'm just venting. I need to get out my negativity, so that I can simply let it go, accept others for where "they are at," and worry about my own growth.
On the other hand, yeah, maybe I'm "doing other people's inventories." But, I have to tell you that I have never met anyone who has reached "spiritual heights" through clueless materialism, hypocrisy, gaivah (pride), nor drugs of any kind. So, these Jews' "inventories" are kind of easy to see.
The thing is that much of this is caused by galuth (diasporah) living. When Jews come to Jerusalem from the U. S., it can really taint their "spiritual searching." It also does not help the situation, when their "rabbis" are stuck in it, too.
Living out in the Shomron (Samaria), amongst Jews building their own homes, digging their own ditches, collecting their own garbage, growing some of their own food, and tending to their livestock, was a great way for me to let go of much of my galuth mentality and my qelipoth (anti-spiritual/anti-Jewish shells). It's not for everyone, and certainly not the only way to grow into a more ge'ulah (redemption) minded Jew. However, it's what worked for me.
Surviving a suicide bombing attack was also very transformational for me. But I do not recommend this, and that's another story for another time.
While in the Shomron, would periodically have to go into Tel-Aviv to do errands, or make my way to the beach, or whatever. It was like venturing into a completely different world, even though I had already lived in Tel-Aviv for two years. The signs were in Hebrew,...well, many of them,...but the life there did not exact seem "Jewish" to me.
Now that I have moved back to Jerusalem, I have been experiencing some of those same feelings. That's pretty sad when we're talking about the Eternal Capital of Am Yisra'el. Although very galuthi in its own way, I still feel more comfortable in the insulated neighborhood of Me'ah She'arim on Shabbath than in one of the above mentioned 'hoods.
I do not regret moving back to Jerusalem at all. But, now that I must find another apartment, I seriously hope that I do not end up in one of these neighborhoods. If I do, though, I will just try to take it on as my next spiritual test. (.... OR just stay in my room in front of the computer, day and night, shunning any opportunities for a local social life, and walking a lot farther than I would like on Shabbath in order to be closer to "my spiritual cup of tea." ...because it's not likely I'll find it in one the neighborhoods described above.)
As condescending as it may sound, I do pray that Jews like the caricatures described eventually find a way to dig themselves out it all.
We are all "searching." At least, I can say that I am. Many of our fellow Jews are "coming back," as it were. Many of them don't even have a clue as to where to begin. We all have to try to be patient and tolerant with our fellow Jews. That includes allowing them to make a lot of their own mistakes, in order to discover the proper path. We have to be patient. But to what extent do we really have to be tolerant?
P. S. I am afraid that comments including a guess as to which neighborhoods I am referring cannot be accepted,...for obvious reasons.
This post flits back and forth between two conversations taking place in separate Jerusalem neighborhoods, and presented in "fashion colors," for CLARITY.
If your blood starts to boil, please push yourself through to the end of the post. You may be surprised by the ending,...or not.
Neighborhood "A"
(2 men talking)
That's SO spiritual!(2 men talking)
Yes, I know. It's creative, too... It's spiritually creative.
Oh, yes! I see.
AND,...it's creatively spiritual.
Yes!
Neighborhood "B"
(2 women talking)
OMG! I am SO glad I found an apartment in THIS neighborhood.(2 women talking)
OMG! I so totally know what you mean. Now we're close to all of the important schuls.
Yeah, but I especially like how it's easy to check out all the hot guys through the mehitzah in the schuls in this neighborhood.
Oh, yeah, cool. I totally forgot about that!
Neighborhood "A"
Reb Shlomo told me to wear purple on Tuesdays to boost my spiritual growth beyond all boundaries of spiritual growth.Really?
Yes. And you also have to make your payos like mine, or else you're not spiritual.
But, no one in Me'ah She'arim makes them like that, and there are some pretty strong hassidishe traditions there.
Doesn't matter. I could teach THEM a thing or two about spirituality. You know what else? I knew Reb Shlomo better that anyway here at this party. They couldn't possibly understand his Toirah and his Simcha like *I* do. Hey! You over there, would you pass the joint over here?!
Neighborhood "B"
OMG! Now that we live in this neighborhood, people will able to see how enlightened and progressive we are.Yeah, I know. Did you know that we have lesbians for neighbors now?
No. Really?
Yes. You can't get more enlightened and progressive than that!
No, you sure can't.... But, we'd never actually have to invite them into our house, would we?
Oh, no! Of course not!
Neighborhood "A"
During S'firah,...you know that means, don't you? S'firas HaOmer. Anyway, S'firah, I have to daven,...you know what davening is, don't you? Anyway, during S'firah, I have to daven with the kevunah,...you know what kevunah is, don't you? Anyway, during S'firah, I have to daven with the kevunah of the s'firos of the day, or I'm not yotzei,...you know what yotzei means, don't you?Wow, that's SO spiritual!
Yes, I know. Hey, you over there! Would you stop hogging the joint!!
Neighborhood "B"
Oh no! I am so upset.Why? What happened?
My Abba cut my allowance down from $1,500 down to $1,250.
OMG! That's so totally unfair!
Yeah, I know! He says it's because the cost of living is much cheaper in Israel than in "The City."
By the way, since when did you start calling your daddy "Abba?"
Oh, no. You don't understand. I've ALWAYS called my daddy "Abba."
(Under her breath: "Yeah, right.")
Neighborhood "A"
I'm giving a shee'eer. You should come to my shee'eer. Did I tell you I'm giving a shee'eer? Yes, Rabbi Yehudah Levy Me'ir Shimon Smith is away, so he asked ME to his shee'eer. You could learn a lot from my shee'eer. You should really come to my shee'eer. Why aren't you coming to my shee'eer?
What's your shi'ur on?
Why, it's on spirituality, of course. Hey, did you see the guy with the joint?
One of the lesbians from next door.
Ssshhhh. Don't say "lesbians." Someone might hear you, and think we're not enlightened and progressive.
OMG! You're right.
What did she want anyway?
She wanted to let us know about the park clean-up party on Friday morning, and to ask us to volunteer. But, don't worry, I said we couldn't come.
Yeah, I know. We're way too busy for that.
I was going to give her a donation instead. But she said that she wasn't collecting any money. She wanted neighbors to donate their time.
Well, there for sure would not be any hot guys there. They play basketball every Friday. And besides, wouldn't we get all dirty?
Yeah, they should just collect money and hire some Arabs to do it.
Ssshhhh. Don't say "Arabs." Someone might hear you, and think we're racist.
OMG! You're right! Hey, by the way, where do the guys play basketball? We could get dressed up, and pretend that we just accidentally came by their particular court.
OMG! Yeah, let's do that!!!
What's your shi'ur on?
Why, it's on spirituality, of course. Hey, did you see the guy with the joint?
Neighborhood "B"
Who was that at the door?One of the lesbians from next door.
Ssshhhh. Don't say "lesbians." Someone might hear you, and think we're not enlightened and progressive.
OMG! You're right.
What did she want anyway?
She wanted to let us know about the park clean-up party on Friday morning, and to ask us to volunteer. But, don't worry, I said we couldn't come.
Yeah, I know. We're way too busy for that.
I was going to give her a donation instead. But she said that she wasn't collecting any money. She wanted neighbors to donate their time.
Well, there for sure would not be any hot guys there. They play basketball every Friday. And besides, wouldn't we get all dirty?
Yeah, they should just collect money and hire some Arabs to do it.
Ssshhhh. Don't say "Arabs." Someone might hear you, and think we're racist.
OMG! You're right! Hey, by the way, where do the guys play basketball? We could get dressed up, and pretend that we just accidentally came by their particular court.
OMG! Yeah, let's do that!!!
*********
So, you think I'm be very judgmental, and otherwise making fun, of other religious Jews?
Well,...yes. But, it's not what you think! ...not entirely, anyway.
You see, I'm just venting. I need to get out my negativity, so that I can simply let it go, accept others for where "they are at," and worry about my own growth.
On the other hand, yeah, maybe I'm "doing other people's inventories." But, I have to tell you that I have never met anyone who has reached "spiritual heights" through clueless materialism, hypocrisy, gaivah (pride), nor drugs of any kind. So, these Jews' "inventories" are kind of easy to see.
The thing is that much of this is caused by galuth (diasporah) living. When Jews come to Jerusalem from the U. S., it can really taint their "spiritual searching." It also does not help the situation, when their "rabbis" are stuck in it, too.
Living out in the Shomron (Samaria), amongst Jews building their own homes, digging their own ditches, collecting their own garbage, growing some of their own food, and tending to their livestock, was a great way for me to let go of much of my galuth mentality and my qelipoth (anti-spiritual/anti-Jewish shells). It's not for everyone, and certainly not the only way to grow into a more ge'ulah (redemption) minded Jew. However, it's what worked for me.
Surviving a suicide bombing attack was also very transformational for me. But I do not recommend this, and that's another story for another time.
While in the Shomron, would periodically have to go into Tel-Aviv to do errands, or make my way to the beach, or whatever. It was like venturing into a completely different world, even though I had already lived in Tel-Aviv for two years. The signs were in Hebrew,...well, many of them,...but the life there did not exact seem "Jewish" to me.
Now that I have moved back to Jerusalem, I have been experiencing some of those same feelings. That's pretty sad when we're talking about the Eternal Capital of Am Yisra'el. Although very galuthi in its own way, I still feel more comfortable in the insulated neighborhood of Me'ah She'arim on Shabbath than in one of the above mentioned 'hoods.
I do not regret moving back to Jerusalem at all. But, now that I must find another apartment, I seriously hope that I do not end up in one of these neighborhoods. If I do, though, I will just try to take it on as my next spiritual test. (.... OR just stay in my room in front of the computer, day and night, shunning any opportunities for a local social life, and walking a lot farther than I would like on Shabbath in order to be closer to "my spiritual cup of tea." ...because it's not likely I'll find it in one the neighborhoods described above.)
As condescending as it may sound, I do pray that Jews like the caricatures described eventually find a way to dig themselves out it all.
We are all "searching." At least, I can say that I am. Many of our fellow Jews are "coming back," as it were. Many of them don't even have a clue as to where to begin. We all have to try to be patient and tolerant with our fellow Jews. That includes allowing them to make a lot of their own mistakes, in order to discover the proper path. We have to be patient. But to what extent do we really have to be tolerant?
*********
P. S. I am afraid that comments including a guess as to which neighborhoods I am referring cannot be accepted,...for obvious reasons.
Where's My Next Apartment In Jerusalem?
20 of the Fifth Month 5769
I have to be out of my current apartment by September 1. Please help me find an apartment, by spreading the word, and by contacting me with your secret information and tips....
So far, I have been checking Flathunting (English), Homeless.co.il (Hebrew), and Yad2.co.il (Hebrew).
Please let me know if you see anything on these sites, on other sites, in the newspaper, notices, or hear anything from friends.
Tomorrow, I hope to put up fliers in various neighborhoods, on notice boards in yeshivas and stores.
Religious Men: I am looking for an apartment in Qiriyath Moshe, Giv'ath Sha'ul, or the surrounding area, but will live in most any neighborhood with the right people in the right location. If you have an apartment and need another roommate, or know someone who does, please contact me. I work, learn a little, am reliable, and do not smoke. Ya'aqov
I have to be out of my current apartment by September 1. Please help me find an apartment, by spreading the word, and by contacting me with your secret information and tips....
So far, I have been checking Flathunting (English), Homeless.co.il (Hebrew), and Yad2.co.il (Hebrew).
Please let me know if you see anything on these sites, on other sites, in the newspaper, notices, or hear anything from friends.
Tomorrow, I hope to put up fliers in various neighborhoods, on notice boards in yeshivas and stores.
Religious Men: I am looking for an apartment in Qiriyath Moshe, Giv'ath Sha'ul, or the surrounding area, but will live in most any neighborhood with the right people in the right location. If you have an apartment and need another roommate, or know someone who does, please contact me. I work, learn a little, am reliable, and do not smoke. Ya'aqovYaaqov.Ben.Yehudah@gmail.com
Sunday, August 09, 2009
I Found It! - Jameel Rashid's Secret Lair
16 of the Fifth Month 5769
After four years of serious stalking, I was finally successful in catching Jameel Rashid while hiding away in his secret lair, otherwise known as "The Muqata."
If you recall, this is not first time I have succeeded in discovering his secret lair. However, last time he just barely escaped my grasp.
DRAT!
Anyway, after investigating a series of clue Jameel was careless to leave around for me to find, I found it! I discovered his secret lair!
In the end, I was kicking myself for how totally obvious it turned out to be. If look carefully, you will that Jameel's secret lair looks just like a waffle!
I was so excited when all of the clues just, all of a sudden, fell together. Of course, my mission had not yet been completed. I had to enter his lair sleathfully, and catch him the act of whatever mischief he plotting and planning.
"AHA! I caught you, Jameel! Don't move!"
"Welcome, Ya'aqov Ben-Yehudah," Jameel calmly said, while relaxing in an armchair, fondling a martini. "I've been expecting you." Then he laughed in such a manner which would put Dr. Evil to shame.
Then, as I was distracted by Jameel's calm repose, Joe Settler jumped out from behind chartreuse sofa, and grabbed me. He had caught me off guard; there was nothing I could have done to escape his hold on me.
Joe forcefully pulled me to one of the walls, where giant ivy began sending out its tendril-like vines, entwining my arms and legs, until I was paralyzed from all movement, save for breathing and speaking.
I thought that I was in an episode of Batman, with Adam West and Burt Ward. I couldn't believe what was happening. Jameel's shenanigans obviously had to include mad scientist experiments on helpless plant life, hoping to find additional ways to carry out his evil plans.
Just then, Jack-Be-Nimble came out a secret revolving door, bearing a toy laser gun, and wearing a thoroughly offensive fluorescent yellow eye mask and multicolored, spandex, full body suit. (Why isn't the fashion police around when you really need them?)
"Let me kill 'im! Let me kill 'im!" He was shouting.
I thought to myself, "Is this my punishment for being a Padres fan?"
Jameel stood up. "Just relax, Jack. You'll get your chance. But first let's see if Ya'aqov will be willing to provide us with certain pieces of information, in exchange for a less torturous execution. Ya'aqov.... Ya'aqov...."
Just then, I awoke from my daydream, to Jameel poking my arm. After a couple of years of discussing it, we had finally arranged to meet in real life. Jameel was on a lunch break. He had the fish. I had the soda water.
"Oh, where was I?"
"I don't know, but it didn't sound very pleasant."
"It was your secret lair. I found it!"
"Impossible! My secret lair is un-findable."
"I'm sure it was your secret lair. It looks just like a waffle, doesn't it?"
Jameel's jaw dropped....
To be continued....
Note: Jameel and I really did meat for lunch. I know he'll kill me for ruin his reputation, but he really is a nice and intelligent guy....
I haven't met too many other bloggers. Apparently, their too busy being glued to their computer screens.
By the way, who can guess what famous building this is in the picture?
After four years of serious stalking, I was finally successful in catching Jameel Rashid while hiding away in his secret lair, otherwise known as "The Muqata."
If you recall, this is not first time I have succeeded in discovering his secret lair. However, last time he just barely escaped my grasp.DRAT!
Anyway, after investigating a series of clue Jameel was careless to leave around for me to find, I found it! I discovered his secret lair!
In the end, I was kicking myself for how totally obvious it turned out to be. If look carefully, you will that Jameel's secret lair looks just like a waffle!
I was so excited when all of the clues just, all of a sudden, fell together. Of course, my mission had not yet been completed. I had to enter his lair sleathfully, and catch him the act of whatever mischief he plotting and planning.
"AHA! I caught you, Jameel! Don't move!"
"Welcome, Ya'aqov Ben-Yehudah," Jameel calmly said, while relaxing in an armchair, fondling a martini. "I've been expecting you." Then he laughed in such a manner which would put Dr. Evil to shame.
Then, as I was distracted by Jameel's calm repose, Joe Settler jumped out from behind chartreuse sofa, and grabbed me. He had caught me off guard; there was nothing I could have done to escape his hold on me.
Joe forcefully pulled me to one of the walls, where giant ivy began sending out its tendril-like vines, entwining my arms and legs, until I was paralyzed from all movement, save for breathing and speaking.
I thought that I was in an episode of Batman, with Adam West and Burt Ward. I couldn't believe what was happening. Jameel's shenanigans obviously had to include mad scientist experiments on helpless plant life, hoping to find additional ways to carry out his evil plans.
Just then, Jack-Be-Nimble came out a secret revolving door, bearing a toy laser gun, and wearing a thoroughly offensive fluorescent yellow eye mask and multicolored, spandex, full body suit. (Why isn't the fashion police around when you really need them?)
"Let me kill 'im! Let me kill 'im!" He was shouting.
I thought to myself, "Is this my punishment for being a Padres fan?"
Jameel stood up. "Just relax, Jack. You'll get your chance. But first let's see if Ya'aqov will be willing to provide us with certain pieces of information, in exchange for a less torturous execution. Ya'aqov.... Ya'aqov...."
Just then, I awoke from my daydream, to Jameel poking my arm. After a couple of years of discussing it, we had finally arranged to meet in real life. Jameel was on a lunch break. He had the fish. I had the soda water.
"Oh, where was I?"
"I don't know, but it didn't sound very pleasant."
"It was your secret lair. I found it!"
"Impossible! My secret lair is un-findable."
"I'm sure it was your secret lair. It looks just like a waffle, doesn't it?"
Jameel's jaw dropped....
To be continued....
*********
Note: Jameel and I really did meat for lunch. I know he'll kill me for ruin his reputation, but he really is a nice and intelligent guy....
I haven't met too many other bloggers. Apparently, their too busy being glued to their computer screens.
By the way, who can guess what famous building this is in the picture?
Shabbath Leftovers - Eiqev 5769: Treppenwitz VS. Esser Agaroth
19 of the Fifth Month 5769
Wouldn't you know it? Shortly after I wrote my first post in this series last week, I receive my [golden engraved] invitation to register for the "Second International Jewish Bloggers Convention." I went immediately to the agenda page, and what do I see?
Today I had rye toast (B) topped with homemade tehinah (B plus - ran out of lemon and olive oil) and sauteed qishu'im (the light green squash that's NOT zucchini) (B), topped off with leftover squash soup (B).
Rye Toast
(70% rye/30% spelt)
slice up remaining rye bread
toast it using your choice of method
Tehinah
(Use "Tehinah Yerushalayim." Everything else is crap. Or ground you own, but that can be a bit time consuming.)
Follow the instructions posted here.
Sauteed Qishu'im
(I forgot to put them in the squash soup I made again this Shabbath.)
Follow the instructions posted here.
Well, I am still waiting for all of those Shabbath meal invitations to begin rolling in....
Hmm... Maybe I will go to the JBloggers Convention, bring some zip lock bags with me, and do some "urban foraging" alla Frum Satire.
Wouldn't you know it? Shortly after I wrote my first post in this series last week, I receive my [golden engraved] invitation to register for the "Second International Jewish Bloggers Convention." I went immediately to the agenda page, and what do I see?
Session 3CThis is a clear indicator that one of the following scenarios is in play:
Be a Better Blogger No one cares what you ate for lunch:
How to write the compelling blog post to build readership.
with David “Treppenwitz” Bogner
3:50 – 4:30 PM (8:50-9:30 AM EST)
And so, without further ado, here's what I had for lunch today. Tell the truth. Do you care?1. Someone within the JBloggers "establishment" (...of which I am clearly not a member) has been reading my blog - Very Doubtful ("They" discount my blog as "extremist."), and has decided to try and sabotage it.
2. There is vast conspiracy to control the content flowing out of the JBlogosphere - Too Obvious, although I am sure that the Israeli Foreign Ministry wouldn't mind being the one in control. But, if there is a conspiracy, then Jameel Rashid is definitely behind it!
3. David “Treppenwitz” Bogner is doing this just to spite me - Doubtful (See scenario #1)
4. David “Treppenwitz” Bogner is lying, and people really do care what I ate for lunch. He's just jealous that his lunches aren't exciting enough to post about, and so he doesn't want anyone to post about theirs. - No Clue He's in India now. So, that means he's either eating at fabulous Five Star Kosher restaurants, or living off of raw fruits and vegetables, cans of tuna he schlepped with him on the plane, and eggs that he prepares himself behind closed doors.
5. Someone in the JBloggers "establishment" assumes that I actually care what other people care about - Very Likely (The JBloggers "establishment" and I do not have the best communication going on. "They" invited the Foreign Ministry representative back to this convention against my explicitly expressed wishes. Go figure...)
Today I had rye toast (B) topped with homemade tehinah (B plus - ran out of lemon and olive oil) and sauteed qishu'im (the light green squash that's NOT zucchini) (B), topped off with leftover squash soup (B).Rye Toast
(70% rye/30% spelt)
slice up remaining rye bread
toast it using your choice of method
Tehinah
(Use "Tehinah Yerushalayim." Everything else is crap. Or ground you own, but that can be a bit time consuming.)
Follow the instructions posted here.
Sauteed Qishu'im
(I forgot to put them in the squash soup I made again this Shabbath.)
Follow the instructions posted here.
Well, I am still waiting for all of those Shabbath meal invitations to begin rolling in....
Hmm... Maybe I will go to the JBloggers Convention, bring some zip lock bags with me, and do some "urban foraging" alla Frum Satire.
Haveil Havalim #229 Is Up!
19 of the Fifth Month 5769
Haveil Havalim Blog Carnival Edition #229 is up at I'll Call Baila!
It's the Modi'in edition.
Check it out!
Haveil Havalim Blog Carnival Edition #229 is up at I'll Call Baila!
It's the Modi'in edition.
Check it out!
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